The DACC Model

The Belief System

The Belief System of abusive men stems from a combination of 1) childhood and life experiences, and 2) male gender role training. Childhood experiences include physical, sexual or emotional abuse, neglect, abandonment and family-of-origin issues that can be emotionally damaging. Male gender training discourages men from developing their "feeling side" in favor of developing their "aggressive side."

It sanctions the use of violence as an acceptable response, seeing people as objects, distancing oneself emotionally, being in control of feelings, pursuing success and expressing power through domination. This process begins early and is recognized as normal male behavior. Unfortunately, this training does not give men the tools or the skills needed to resolve conflict in an assertive (as opposed to aggressive) manner.

A man's belief system can also support women as users, takers, or predators. This springs from his perception that the world (including women) is a dangerous place. To survive, he develops a repertoire of behaviors that aim to control or dominate those things that are supposed to bring him happiness and satisfaction. Childhood survival skills have become skills that cause pain and prohibit him from realizing satisfaction in his adult life and relationships.

Abusive Behavior and the DACC Model

Any behavior that a man perceives as a threat evokes a strong emotional response. Lacking the skills and language to identify the feelings being triggered, he responds with the only acceptable male emotion -- anger. Anger blinds and produces a negative reaction in the form of a negative, abusive response. Thoughts related to the behavior typically blame the victim for provoking the abusive incident.

Non-Abusive Behavior and the DACC Model

Until a man's belief system is challenged, he will continue to behave abusively. Change is only possible once the abusive pattern is reversed. Using the non-abusive model, he will not react to initial feelings of rage but will instead think about his choices -- choices learned in group. Only then can he think about non-abusive choices and act positively. Lastly, he can identify and process the primary feelings that were triggered initially.

How to Use the DACC Model

  1. Using a specific abusive incident, focus on:
    1. what you are feeling before you choose an abusive response (usually expressed as anger or rage)
    2. how you react to the perceived threat or provocation (the abusive behavior)
    3. what you are thinking following the abusive behavior.
  2. Slow the process down -- review the incident again, focusing on:
    1. positive choices and options (vs. abusive reactions)
    2. primary feelings (vs. anger and rage)
  3. Rework the incident using the non-abusive track. Focus on:
    1. slowing the process and thinking about safe, choices/options
    2. taking positive action to deal with the situation
    3. processing the primary feelings.

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